Returning Home
by Caskett1960
Summary: Post-7x01. Kate tries to reconcile her feelings regarding Castle's two-month absence while Castle tries to come to terms with the guilt of how much pain he's caused. M rated for Chapter 2.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMERS: No, I don't own anything that you would recognize.**

**SUMMARY: Post-7x01. Kate tries to reconcile her feelings regarding Castle's two-month absence while Castle tries to come to terms with the guilt of how much pain he's caused.**

**A/N #1: I loved 'Driven' and I love the questions that it's raised. Who took Castle? Why did they take him? What, if any, part does Martha play in all of this? I look forward to getting the answers.**

**A/N #2: This story will be two chapters. One of these chapters will be M-rated.**

**RETURNING HOME**

**CHAPTER 1**

It was early in the morning or late at night, depending on how you wanted to look at it. The rain falling against the windowpanes matched Kate Beckett's mood perfectly. She was sitting in the window seat in the dining room of Castle's loft, staring out into the inky blackness of a New York City night, the tears streaking her cheeks mimicking the rain pattering against the window.

She didn't understand why she was crying; why she was so sad. Rick was home. He was home and he was safe. She wanted to believe that he really didn't remember anything after seeing the SUV. She really wanted to believe that he wouldn't put her through that kind of pain. She knew for a fact that he'd never put his mother or Alexis through it. There had to be some kind of an explanation that made sense. She'd find the answers. There was no way that she wouldn't find them. After all, she'd managed to find Rick when everybody else had given up. Everybody else had told her that he had just walked away from his life. Kate knew that was impossible.

Sure, there were things that didn't make sense. Who was this fake Henry Jenkins and why had he staged that campsite to appear as if Castle was staying there? Why did they have surveillance footage of Castle dropping ten thousand dollars into a dumpster to have that car destroyed? Had he been coerced or threatened in any way? Was his captors close by watching him?

Those were just a few of the questions that were weighing heavily on Kate's mind. She'd cried in Castle's arms earlier that night. He'd held her so sweetly and had apologized so wholeheartedly. He'd also told her that he knew he must've missed her terribly because there was no way that he wouldn't. In his mind, he'd only been gone for a few days. He still couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that he'd been gone for two months. After she'd cried herself out, they'd got into bed and he'd wrapped himself around her, much as he had before he went missing.

Instead of feeling comfort in his arms as she had before his disappearance, now Kate felt like she was smothering. She hadn't slept in their bed since a week after he went missing. She'd retreated to her apartment, where she could hide and not have to look into the faces of the two women that loved Castle as much as she did. She couldn't come home and have to tell them that there was no news. It had almost broken her heart the day that she'd had to explain to them that the FBI had scaled back the investigation. She didn't tell them that the FBI agent working the case thought that Castle had staged all of this. She knew that Alexis and Martha would never buy that he'd just walk out of their lives. Kate knew that in Castle's eyes, the sun rose and set on his daughter. Nothing short of death would take him away from her.

Kate had thought that when they found him alive, she'd instantly launch herself into his arms, smothering his face with kisses, and cry tears of relief and joy. Instead she'd found herself angered by his glib attitude after he'd regained consciousness. She hadn't wanted to believe him when he told her that he didn't remember anything. It was only after the two of them traveled to the campsite and found the real Henry Jenkins that Kate had finally started to believe his story of not remembering. So why was she still so angry and sad? Why did it still feel like her heart had been broken into a million pieces?

***CCC***

The rain hitting the bedroom windows was what woke Castle up out of a sound sleep, seconds before he reached out and discovered that Kate wasn't in bed beside him. He sat up and looked around. There was no light shining from the bathroom, so he knew that she wasn't in there. She'd been so sad the night before when he'd held her crying in his arms. He felt awful for the hell that he'd put her through over the summer. He wished that he could remember something, anything, to give her the answers that he knew that she craved.

He got out of bed and padded his way out to the living room. It was only when he saw the flash of lightning through the opened dining room blinds that he knew where Kate had disappeared to. He stopped by the dining table and watched her, his heart breaking when he saw the tears on her face. He'd give anything to remember these past two months. To know where he'd been and with whom. "Kate?" He whispered as he approached her.

"Hey, Castle," she wiped at her face when she turned to face him.

"I hate that I'm the one responsible for his," he sat across from her on the window seat and wiped away her tears with his thumbs. "I wish I had the answers that you're looking for."

"Like I told you last night, we'll figure it out. I should be happy," she gave him a weak smile. "You're home and except for some memory loss, you're okay."

"These past two months must've been hell on earth for you," he reached out for her hand, his breath catching when she actually let him take it. Except for her crying in his arms the night before, they hadn't touched or even kissed since his return home.

"It was awful, Castle. At least with my mom . . . at least I knew that she was dead. I had somewhere where I could visit, to mourn her loss. With you, I had nothing. We knew that you'd been taken, but every single piece of evidence that we found pointed to the fact that you had been a part of it. In my heart I knew that wasn't true, but as a cop, I had to look at the evidence. It was hard to keep my faith."

"We're going to get through this. Like I told you last night, we're going to find our way home."

"Are you sure that you don't remember anything? You don't remember the dinghy or how you got the bullet graze in your ribs?"

"I don't remember anything, Kate. The last thing that I remember after I talked to you on our wedding day was looking into my rearview mirror and seeing a black SUV. I thought it was a little odd, so I sped up and then it pulled up beside me. That's the last thing that I remember."

"You couldn't see who was in the car?"

"No, the windows were tinted dark. It was too dark to see inside. I wish that I could remember."

"I missed you, Castle," she choked out, moving forward and throwing her arms around his neck, holding him tightly as she cried into his neck.

"Oh, I missed you, too," he wrapped his arms around her back and cried tears of his own. He rubbed her back, feeling her spine under the shirt that she was wearing. When had she got so thin? "Do you think that you can come back to bed? I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted."

Kate pulled back so that she could look at him. His skin was still red and raw from the sunburn that he'd suffered during his days on the dinghy. She could see the exhaustion in the lines around his eyes. "Let's go back to bed," she stood up and pulled him by the hand back toward their bedroom.

They both climbed into bed and Castle tugged onto Kate's hand, pulling her down onto his chest. "We're going to be all right, Kate," his lips brushed the top of her head.

More tears leaked from Kate's eyes as she rested against Castle's shoulder. For two months she had dreamed of going to sleep just like this once again. For two months she had gone to sleep crying and had woke herself up crying. She moved down until her head was resting on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. That soothing sound finally lulled her to sleep, the first sound sleep she'd had in more than two months.

***CCC***

Castle stumbled into the living room the next morning and smiled at the sight of his daughter in the kitchen. "Good morning, pumpkin," he walked up to her and kissed her on the cheek.

"Where's Kate?"Alexis asked, handing her father a cup of coffee.

"Still sleeping. She had a rough night. I'm glad to see that my three favorite ladies managed to hold down the fort during my absence."

"Dad, Kate didn't stay here while you were missing," Alexis kept her voice low so that Kate wouldn't overhear.

"What do you mean? This is her home, too."

"She did stay for the first week, but it got to be too hard for her to come home to face me and Grams. It was hard for her to keep telling us that there was no news. It was hard for all of us to keep hope alive when everybody was telling us that you didn't want to be found."

"I would never just walk away from my family," Castle whispered with tears in his eyes.

"I know that, dad. But you weren't here to hear and read the awful things that were being said and written about you. We were and it was hard. But I think that as hard as it was on me and Grams, it was doubly hard on Kate because she's already been through the pain of losing someone that she loves once."

"I wish that I could remember. I wish that I could tell all of you where I was, but I can't."

"I know," Alexis squeezed her father's hand. "You're back now and that's what matters."

"Thank you," Castle kissed his daughter's forehead.

"For what?"

"For . . . everything," he smiled before fixing another cup of coffee to take to Kate.

When he re-entered the bedroom, Kate was just emerging from the bathroom, buttoning her shirt. "I have to get to work," she smiled at him tentatively before taking the cup of coffee from him. "Thank you."

"I have some errands to run this morning, but I was wondering if I could come to work this afternoon."

"Of course, Castle," she assured him. "I've missed having you with me."

"Okay. I should be there sometime after lunch."

"Good," she reached up and lightly touched his face. "I'll see you in a few hours."

Castle waited until he heard the door of the loft close before taking out his cell phone and bringing up a familiar name in his contacts. The phone was answered on the second ring. "Hi, I was wondering if maybe we could meet for breakfast. Yeah, 10:30 is fine. Thank you."

***CCC***

Before going to the precinct, Kate made a stop at the OCME. Going down to the morgue, she found Lanie getting ready to start her day. "Hey, girl. I was going to send you a text to see how you were doing. Did you get Writer Boy home and settled back in all right?"

"Yeah. He's going to come back to work this afternoon," Kate walked over and hopped up onto one of the examination tables.

"Kate, what's wrong?" One look at her best friend's face told the M.E. that all wasn't quite right with her world.

"I know that I should be happy, Lanie," tears once again began to trickle down Kate's face. "Damn it, I hate crying!" She wiped angrily at her face, smudging her makeup in the process. "I should be happy that Rick's home. We got him back alive and relatively unscathed. How many families can say that? What in the hell is wrong with me?"

"I think that a part of you is angry at him for not having an explanation for where he's been for two months."

"That's not his fault, Lanie. He can't help it that he doesn't remember."

"I know that you know that, but as a cop, you're used to having answers. As long as I've known you, you've been the person who always has to know why things happen the way that they do. I think that's why you had so much trouble letting your mom's murder go. You wanted to know why. And while Castle is telling you that he doesn't remember anything that happened to him, there's that part of you that still wants to know why. Why doesn't he remember? Who took him and why did they take him? Was it about you? Was it about him? Or was it just a random event where maybe he was in the wrong place at the wrong time?"

"I feel myself pulling away from him and I don't want to. I know that he senses it. He asked me last night if we could just go back to the way things were before this happened. I told him that we can't."

"That's true; you can't. But Kate, you know that he wouldn't just walk away from his life. I know that you're going to find out what happened. And when you do, you're going to make it right."

"You're right," she wiped at her face again. "I'm definitely going to find out what happened. Then maybe we can do this whole wedding planning thing again."

"Hopefully this time without the burning car at the bottom of the ravine," Lanie added as Kate made a face. "Sorry. Too soon?"

"Way too soon," Kate hopped off of the table before giving her best friend a hug. "I'll talk to you later."

***CCC***

Castle entered the diner at 10:30 on the dot and immediately spotted Jim Beckett sitting at his usual table. "Thank you for taking the time to meet me," Castle sat down as the waitress came over and filled his coffee cup. "Thank you," he smiled before she turned and walked away.

"I take it that you're here about Katie," Jim guessed as he took a sip of his coffee.

"I don't know how much she's told you about what's going on, but she's having a rough time and I don't really understand why."

"Rick, I know that you feel like you were only gone for a few days, but those two months might as well have been 20 years to Katie. She pretty much hid herself away from everybody during those two months. It was hard for her to keep hope alive when every single piece of evidence that she and the boys found proved otherwise. Whoever did this to you, Rick, did a damn good job of making it look like you were a part of it. The FBI came in at the beginning, but they only stayed a couple of weeks. Katie tried to convince them that while you might've walked away from her and your upcoming marriage, you would never have left your daughter."

"I also never would've left Kate."

"I know that, Rick. And deep down, Katie knows it, too. But right now, she just needs some time to sort things through in her own head. I know that you want things to be the way that they were and I think that eventually you two will get back to that. But, right now the most important things that you can give to Katie are time and space."

"Thanks, Jim," Castle said before standing up. "Thank you again for meeting with me."

When he walked back into the loft an hour later, he walked over to his laptop and booted it up. Going into Google, he typed in **'Richard Castle disappearance' **to see what came up. His eyes filled with tears when he saw the picture of his Mercedes on fire and Kate in her wedding dress, kneeling on the ground staring at her hands.

He had no idea what lengths his abductors had gone to in order to take him away from his fiancée and his family. "Oh god, Kate. I am so sorry."

**A/N #3: Chapter 2 will have Caskett-y goodness in it because who doesn't like reunion sex?**

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	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMERS: Nope, still not mine.**

**SUMMARY: Castle and Kate try to reconnect as she recalls the events of the day that he vanished. **

**A/N #1: This chapter will be M-rated.**

Chapter 2

Castle was still staring at the Internet articles dealing with his disappearance when he heard the door open. He quickly wiped his wet face off on his sleeve before getting up and making his way to the living room. Martha turned to look at him from the doorway. "Hello, Richard. I thought that you were going to meet Kate at the precinct."

"I am. I mean, I was. I had coffee with Jim this morning. Mother, you know that I wasn't responsible for any of this, don't you? You know that I would never willingly walk away from you, Kate, or Alexis."

"Of course, darling. We're going to get all of this ironed out and then things can go back to normal again."

"I just can't wrap my mind around any of this. How could I be gone for two months and not remember any of it?" He sat down heavily on the sofa as his mother came to sit beside him.

"The doctor at the hospital said that you didn't have any head trauma, so his only explanation was that your captors had drugged you with something. Only by the time you were found, the drugs were no longer in your system."

"I know all of that. They explained that to me at the hospital. But shouldn't I remember something? Anything that would explain where I was or what I was doing?"

"Darling, I'm sure that you will, in time," Martha patted his knee before getting up and going to the kitchen.

"Did Kate say anything before she went back to her apartment? Alexis told me this morning that she only stayed here for a week. Did she say anything to you about why she didn't want to stay here? I thought that this was her home, too."

"Richard, those are questions that you'll have to ask Kate."

"Why? Did she just leave without an explanation?"

"Again Richard, those are questions that only Katherine can answer," Martha replied somewhat impatiently. In her mind, the 'why's' didn't matter. Richard was home now. What he needed was rest, not endless questions about where he had been for two months.

"I suppose you're right," he sighed. "I was thinking that maybe I could cook dinner for her tonight and we could just talk. Just the two of us."

"That is an excellent idea," Martha smiled. "Alexis and I can make ourselves scarce for the evening."

"Alexis told me this morning before she left for class that she's going to be studying late at the library. I'm sorry, Mother. I know that you just got me home and now I feel like I'm chasing you and Alexis off."

"Nonsense. I'm sure that you and Katherine have a lot to talk about."

"I saw the pictures on the Internet. I had no idea whoever took me would go to that length to make it look like—"

"Richard, you're home now and you're safe. I'm going to change clothes and go to my school. Have a nice evening with Katherine," she walked over and kissed him on the cheek.

"I hope to, thank you."

Castle sighed as he watched his mother go upstairs. Why didn't anybody understand that he had questions that needed to be answered? He had a two-month chunk of time lost that he was never going to get back. He knew that what had happened was very traumatic to all of them, but to listen to his mother, he'd just been gone on one of his book tours. He wondered what was up with that.

***CCC***

Kate had just come out of interrogation where she'd been questioning a suspect when her cell phone vibrated against her hip. She took it out of her pocket and smiled when she saw that she had a text from Castle. She swept her finger across her screen and read the message. **'Errands took longer than I thought. Can't make it to precinct today. Are you coming home after you get off work? I miss you and I love you. Rick.'**

Kate thought for a moment before sending a message back. **'I should be out of here by 5. Will see you by 5:30 or 5:45. I miss you and love you, too. Kate.'**

"Where's Castle? I thought he was coming back in today," Ryan interrupted her musing.

"He was. He had some errands that took longer than he figured. He'll come in with me tomorrow. Are you and Espo okay with that?" Kate asked.

"Yeah. It isn't the same around here without him."

Kate nodded and walked away. She knew how hard Kevin and Javi had tried to protect her during the time that Castle was missing. Javi, in particular, had a very hard time dealing with what the evidence was telling them. She knew that he was still very angry and hurt, even though new evidence was suggesting that Castle had been taken against his will. But none of them could erase the memory of finding his car at the bottom of that ravine, engulfed in flames. Kate involuntarily flexed her fingers, remembering the heat of the fire as she tried to reach his door handle, thinking he was still inside of the car.

Esposito looked up from his desk when Kate came by. "What's new with our suspect?"

"Nothing. He asked for a lawyer, so I had him taken back to holding. Castle's going to come back to work tomorrow. Do you have a problem with that?"

"Why would I have a problem?" He got up and walked over to her desk, sitting in Castle's chair as Kate glared at him. "Sorry. You're not going to shoot me, are you?" He made a reference to the night she almost shot the night janitor for attempting to remove Castle's chair from the bullpen.

"Don't tempt me."

"Kate, I'm sorry for everything that I said while he was missing. But even you have to admit that things looked like shit. And we have yet to explain how he came to put that money in the dumpster."

"There has to be an explanation for it. Maybe whoever took Castle was nearby. Maybe they had threatened me or his family. We're going to figure it out. Until we do, I really don't want to keep rehashing it."

"Do you think he'll ever remember?"

"I don't know. The psychiatrist at the hospital didn't sound too hopeful. She said amnesia is rarely like they show it in movies and TV shows."

"But you're sure that he's not faking it?"

"Javi, I know him," she looked at her friend. "I know that he makes up stories for a living, but I do believe him about this one. The look on his face when I told him that he'd been missing for two months and then when I took him to that campsite and he explained to me why he'd never camp in that particular spot because of the weather. He doesn't remember any of it. And while the possibility exists that he might leave me; he'd never leave his mother or his daughter."

"He'd never leave you, either," Javi gave her a tight smile before getting up and returning to his desk.

***CCC***

After his mother left, Castle left the loft and went to the market to shop for Kate's favorite foods. When he returned to the loft, he went into the kitchen to begin prepping for dinner. He then put a bottle of wine on to chill and turned his iPod on to play some John Coltrane. He wanted everything to be perfect. Kate deserved that much after the hell that he'd put her through that summer. He couldn't believe that it was now September. He couldn't remember June, July and a big chunk of August. But he knew that Kate could remember those months all too well. They were imbedded in her memory just like the night of her mother's murder was forever in her memory. He hated that he was the one who was causing her so much pain this time. He didn't even know if there was a way for him to make this up to her. After all, he had ruined what was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives.

***CCC***

Before she even got her key in the door, Kate could smell a heavenly aroma coming from the loft. She wondered what wonderful creation Castle was making them for dinner. She opened the door and was surprised to find that Castle seemed to be the only person in the loft. "Hi," she greeted him before going to the closet to hang up her light jacket. "Where is everybody?"

"Alexis has a late study night and mother has something going on at her school. I'd tell you what it is, but to tell you the truth, I'm not sure I understood it. So, that leaves just you and me. Are you okay with that?"

"Yeah. I mean, of course I'm okay with it. Something smells good," she decided to change the subject before she said something she'd regret.

"I am making chicken with mushrooms and brown rice. I remember that you seemed to enjoy that the last time that I made it for us."

"Yes, I did," she sat on one of the stools and took the glass of wine that Castle was handing to her. "Do you need my help with anything?"

"No, I've got everything under control. Why don't you go and get changed while I set the table?"

"Okay," she hopped off of the barstool and went back to their bedroom.

While she was gone, Castle quickly turned on the iPod before going over to the dining table where he set it and then lit the two taper candles in the middle of the table. After making sure that everything was perfect, he went to the oven and removed the hot dish inside and placed it on a hot pad between the two candles.

Kate came out of the bedroom moments later wearing a pair of sweat pants and one of Castle's t-shirts. "I've missed seeing you wearing my shirts," he smiled as she sat down at the table.

"This is the first one I've worn in a while," she admitted, her voice small and full of pain. "Can I ask you a question?" 

"Of course," he took her plate and filled it before sitting down across from her.

"Are Martha and Alexis out of the loft on purpose?"

"I just thought that maybe you'd want to talk alone without being inundated by family."

"I don't know what you want me to say, Castle," her eyes quickly filled with tears.

"I don't expect you to say anything, Kate. I know that these past two months have been awful for you, but I don't remember anything."

"I _know _that," she hissed at him.

"Kate, what I'm trying to say is I have blanks. Remember when we first met and I told you that there's always a story?"

"I remember."

"I need to know what my story is. When did you know something was wrong? Who called you? How did you find out that I'd been taken?"

"I'll tell you the whole story, Castle, but can we at least eat dinner first?" She smiled at him.

"Of course. I'm sorry. You must be starved. I'm betting you've been subsisting on coffee and M&M's since I've been gone."

"Oh, I threw in a few gummy bears for variety," she teased as she began to eat. "Oh, this is wonderful, Castle."

"I'm glad you like it," he smiled as he too began to dig in.

After dinner, she helped him to clean up the kitchen before they settled down next to each other on the sofa. "What's the first thing that you remember?" She asked him, staring into his impossibly blue eyes; blue eyes she thought she'd never see again.

"Waking up and seeing my mother and Alexis. At first I wasn't even aware that I was in a hospital bed. That is, until I heard the beeping and saw the monitors. I asked for you and mother tried to sidetrack me while Alexis went out and called you. What happened after we spoke that day?" He asked her, squeezing her fingers when she averted her eyes.

"I feel like I've done nothing but cry for two months," she let out a harsh laugh. "I shouldn't be crying anymore, Castle. I got you back."

"It's still catching up with both of us. I'd love to be able to remember; to tell you where I've been and with whom for the last two months."

"Hopefully you will one day. You were supposed to be 20 minutes away, but you never showed up. I tried texting you and calling you, but the calls went straight to your voicemail. Then my phone rang with a number that I didn't recognize. I didn't want to answer it, Castle, because I knew . . . I knew that something awful had happened," her voice cracked as tears began to run down her face. "The man on the phone was from the Hamptons Police and he told me that there had been an accident. I don't remember the next several minutes. I know that I ran downstairs and jumped in the Rolls. The driver thought that I was crazy, but I screamed at him to just drive."

Kate wiped at her eyes until Castle got up and got the box of tissues from the end of the counter, setting them on the sofa between them. "Did my mother and Alexis know what had happened?"

"No," she shook her head. "But everybody must've known that something was wrong because they were right behind me when I got to the accident scene. Your car was at the bottom of this ditch and it was on fire. I couldn't even breathe; I couldn't even think. The only thing going through my mind was that I couldn't do this again. I couldn't lose somebody else that I loved. I had to get you out of that car. I heard Javi yelling at me not to go down there; that there wasn't anything that I could do. I was ruining my dress, but I didn't care. I tried to reach the door, but it was so hot. Then I just collapsed onto the ground. I felt water hitting me and saw the fire department up on the road. I didn't want to look inside of the car after the fire was out, but I had to. I saw that the air bag had deployed and it was all melted to the steering wheel, but the inside of the car was empty."

"I saw the pictures on the Internet. How did you know that I'd been taken?"

"I didn't, at first. I wanted to help find you. We thought that maybe you'd crawled away from the wreck and were hurt somewhere. Javi convinced me to go back to the house to change, so Martha took me and Alexis back to the house. Alexis was in shock, Castle. I didn't even know what to say to her. I feel awful because I just left her there without saying anything to her . . . you're her father. I should've offered her some kind of comfort!"

"Let me deal with that, okay?"

"While I was changing, Javi called me and told me that Kevin had found pieces of broken taillight on the road and that there was damage to the back passenger side of the car. The captain from the Hamptons Police also found evidence that showed you had been dragged from the car."

"By the guys in the black SUV," Castle guessed.

"Castle, are you sure that you don't know Henry Jenkins?"

"I've never seen him before or heard of him in my life. You said that the Coast Guard found me," he said as she nodded. "I was just floating in a dinghy off the coast of Rhode Island?"

"Eighty miles off the coast of Delaware. They estimated you'd been out at sea four or five days."

"They must've drugged me. What do you suppose they gave me?"

"I don't know. Probably Special K."

"Kate, why didn't you stay here? Alexis told me that you went back to your apartment after the first week. This is your home."

"But it wasn't, Castle. Not really. Not without you. It got harder to keep up the front. To come here and give them false hope when I was feeling so hopeless most of the time. I was mad and I was scared. I didn't want Martha and Alexis to see me like that. They had enough fears of their own without me adding to them."

"I want to remember," he rubbed her fingers. "I want to be able to prove to you and everybody else out there that I didn't get cold feet and stage an elaborate ruse to avoid getting married."

"I know that."

"I'd never walk away from you," he looked at her with a twinkle in his eyes. "I might have walked away from Meredith or Gina, but I'd never walk away from you." She smiled at him and rolled her eyes. "See? That earned me a smile and the famous Beckett eye roll. Come here," he reached out to pull her closer to him. "I missed you so fucking much."

Kate whimpered at the first contact of his lips against hers. She'd dreamed of this moment for two months. Had awakened after dreams where she could've sworn she'd felt his hands on her, his lips and tongue everywhere. She moaned when she felt his tongue sweeping against hers, reawakening the memory of every time he'd ever kissed her like this in the past. Their breathing was ragged when the need for oxygen forced them apart. "I've missed you, too," she rested her forehead against his, her breathing harsh and her heart pounding.

He stood up and took her hand, pulling her off of the sofa and to their bedroom, where he led her over to the bed and gently lowered her onto the mattress. She stared up at him with huge brownish green eyes filled with love and lust, biting her lip when she felt his fingers hook into the waistband of her sweats and slowly pull them down her legs, leaving her clad in just his shirt and her panties. Lowering himself on top of her, his mouth once again found hers. Kate wound her fingers through his hair, stroking the back of his scalp as their mouths devoured each other.

Kate removed her hands from his hair to slip them under his shirt, feeling the warmth of his bare skin against her fingers. Her fingertips once again familiarized themselves with every inch of skin. He let out a slight hiss when her fingers brushed against the new scar along his ribs. She let out a whine when she felt his erection pressing against her. It had been too long since she'd felt like this; since either of them had felt like this. She reached her hand down and rubbed against the fly of his jeans, earning a growl from her fiancé.

Kate let out another whine when he left her mouth, but that whine turned into a sigh of delight when his lips traveled to her jaw and the sensitive spot behind her ear. "Castle, get your clothes off," she nipped at his lower lip when he returned to her mouth.

He stood up and quickly stripped out of his shirt, jeans, shoes and socks, all the while Kate was chasing him to keep him in close contact to her. He grinned widely as he lowered himself back down to her, kissing her again as he let his hands card through her hair. "I love you," he smiled, rubbing his nose against hers as she gave him the wide, bright smile that he loved so much. The smile that she reserved only for him.

"I love you, too," she brought him down and softly kissed him before pushing back on him to get him to stand up. Rising up, she grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and lifted it over her head, tossing it over his head.

Castle's breath caught at the sight of her naked torso. He brought his hand up to cover her breast as Kate let out a soft moan. Feeling her nipple stiffen against his palm, he pushed Kate back onto the bed before he moved down to cover her once again. He kept caressing her breast while his lips moved softly over hers, his tongue stroking against hers. He groaned when he felt her scissor her legs behind his calves, holding him firmly against her. He trailed his lips down to her neck, gently biting on her pulse point, smiling against her neck when she cried out. He reached behind him and uncoiled her legs before he began making his way down to her breasts.

"Ooooh, Castle," she cried out when she felt his mouth on her breast, his tongue flicking over her erect nipple. She once again carded her fingers into his hair, holding him close to her breast. Not wanting her other breast to be left out, he turned his attention to it, laving her nipple as he felt Kate arch against him.

Soon Kate felt him kissing his way down her torso, his fingers guiding him along the way. Her stomach clenched when she felt him swirling his tongue along her hips, just above the top of her panties. Latching his fingers into her panties, he pulled them down her legs and just stood at the end of the bed, admiring her. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. "What're you looking at?"

"You are so beautiful," he dropped to his knees at the end of the bed, kissing the inside of her thighs.

Kate found it hard to breathe. She always found it hard to breathe when they made love. The anticipation of knowing just how he could make her fall apart at the touch of his lips and tongue on her was so powerful. "Oh fuck, Castle!" She screamed out when she finally felt his lips on her, just barely brushing against her erect clit. Then he gave her the harder, firmer touch that he knew she liked, just bringing her to the edge but not letting her go over just yet.

Only this time she knew that it wasn't going to take long. After all, it had been more than two months since she'd felt him touch her like this, since he'd tasted her, made love to her, made her scream out her pleasure.

Castle felt Kate card her fingers into his hair, holding him tighter to her as he took her clit between his teeth and gently bit it, earning another shriek from his fiancée. He slid first one finger into her and then added a second one, angling up to reach her g-spot as she moaned her encouragement. "Kate, let go," he murmured as he worked his fingers faster inside of her.

Kate could feel the trembling in her legs along with that familiar tension that started in her belly and just radiated outward. "Oh shit, Castle!" She screamed out his name as she tightened around his fingers.

Castle slowed his fingers down, allowing her to ride out the waves of her orgasm. It seemed like several minutes later before she felt him moving back up her body. She could taste herself on him when they shared a long kiss. "Hey," he whispered, brushing her sweat soaked hair from her face.

"Hey," she whispered back. She gave him an impish smile before shoving him over onto his back and pulling his boxers from his body. "That was mind blowing, but now I need you inside of me."

"Do we need to use . . . protection?"

"I didn't stop taking the pill, Castle. I knew that you were coming back," she reached down for him, stroking him a few times before placing him at her entrance and sinking down his length, letting out a breathy moan at the feel of him filling her once again.

Castle almost lost it right then and there at the feel of Kate's warm wetness surrounding him. He reached up for her breasts when she began to move on him, raising almost all of the way off before sliding back down on him. He watched her as she moved. Her head was thrown back, her eyes closed as she rocked against him. He had never seen a more beautiful sight in his life.

Kate cried out when she felt him sit up and wrap his arms around her, holding her close to him. "I love you," he kissed her as he began to thrust up into her.

"I love you, too," she buried her face into his neck, inhaling the scent of him. "I want to come with you this time, Castle. Please touch me."

He dropped a hand down to where they were joined, swirling his fingers against her, feeling her buck against him. "Are you close?"

"So close," she chanted. "Don't stop, Castle!"

He felt her muscles fluttering around him as she bit into his shoulder. He gave out a sharp cry before spilling inside of her, holding Kate tightly against him. "Wow," he finally said as he felt Kate pull back slightly.

"Is that all you have to say? Just 'wow?'" Her eyes were shining brightly as she smiled at him.

"Words are escaping me at the moment."

"I want to stay with you just like this," she pushed him over as he scooted down into the bed. She then reached behind her and tugged the comforter up over them. "I like being close with you."

"I like being close with you, too," he stroked her back as she rested on his chest, her head over his heart.

"This felt so right, Castle. It was so perfect."

"Hey," the way that he said the word caused her to glance up at him. "We're going to get things back on track, Kate."

"I know," she smiled before sliding up and brushing her lips against his. "So, how are you feeling?"

"How am I-? How am I feeling? Well, I just made love to my beautiful, sexier than hell fiancée. I feel pretty good. How are you feeling?"

"Come with me and I'll show you exactly how I'm feeling," she gave him a mischievous smile before climbing off of him, taking him by the hand and pulling him off of the bed and toward the ensuite.

Half an hour later, Castle was back in bed, holding a thoroughly sated Kate close to him. Her smile was adorable as she drifted off to sleep in his arms. He closed his eyes, trying to ward off the dreams that he knew would wake him up in the night. Dreams of things that he didn't understand and wasn't even sure he wanted to understand. But he was home now and that was all that mattered. Maybe his memory would return and maybe it wouldn't. The important thing was he was back home with his family. And that was enough for right now.

**A/N #2: I have my own theories about what happened to Castle in Hollander's Woods. I think the story that he told Kate in 'Vampire Weekend' wasn't as made up as he led her to believe. I also have a theory about Martha's role in it. **

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